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Editor’s Note: A little while back, I was having a conversation online with a close guy friend of mine about “breaks.” As we learned from Ross on “Friends,” the rules of being on a break can get murky and may wind up costing you your entire relationship.Being on a break is different for men and women because men and women are very different when it comes to relationships in general… The conversation I was having with my friend got so interesting and enlightening, I asked him to elaborate further on the subject and took our exchange and turned it into an entire article. Whenever a guy says he wants a “break” or some time to just “chill for a bit,” it usually means he’s feeling stressed or overwhelmed by the relationship and needs time to work things out on his own.Not seeing it when you’re flipping through your phone will help initiate the healing process. The arguments and the negativity didnt stop and in the heat of the moment i broke things off… I said i didnt mean it but he says it hurt him so much and ive hurt him so much since the internship that he needs time to think about the future.Even though you may not want to, if you pretend long enough to be cold-hearted and distant with him, you’ll slowly find yourself getting over it. I will not spend my time trying to convince anyone to stay with me or to love me, I’ve done this before and it just makes them lose respect for you. It gives them power over you and then they feel like they can treat you anyhow. He doesnt want to let me go because he still loves me he says.It’s not that You also can’t bug him for reassurance that he’s gonna come back and the relationship will resume.Instead, use that time to focus on other areas of your life. Confidence is a huge turn on for a guy and whether you’re a guy or a girl, you always want what you can’t have.Maybe he’ll go to the gym, maybe he’ll go out with his friends, maybe he’ll devote himself to his job, anything to make him feel like he’s back on top.While he’s working on putting himself back together, the worst thing his girl can do is fall apart and burden him with constant texts and questions.
The girl will usually see it as some kind of rejection or abandonment and will go into crisis mode.Guys are just wired differently and handle stressful situations differently, this does not include talking about the problem for most men. So what should a girl do when her guy wants to take a break? Just give him the space he needs to deal with his issue and focus on other things in the meantime.Even if he is going through a hard time, just leave it alone and let him handle it on his own.Even if the problems aren’t overt, he may be feeling unhinged about some aspect of the relationship, oftentimes it’s by the fact that the relationship is getting more serious.Whether he officially says he needs space or he just disappears, this situation usually causes problems in the relationship because a guy and a girl will see it in two totally different ways.